Dear Journal,

I’ve realized that the most significant things always happen in the most ordinary, seemingly insignificant moments. Just like the rising of the sun. Think about it.

“Happy new year” Everybody screamed

I heard the excitement in their voices, some a little louder than others, but it was there in the twinkle in their tired eyes, the spring in their steps, their body movements an indication of the fireworks in their hearts. The pump was hard to miss, the joy of the new year and potential resolutions were all that mattered in that moment but yet, there I sat in my chair wondering what really changed. The headache I had the night before was still very much present, the stars remained in the sky just like every other day, the clouds still as dark and lifeless as they were before the clock turned 12. So what really changed? Why was it that the entrance to a new year, new beginning felt so “ordinary” It really was just a new day to be honest and that’s when it clicked

You see, my 2017, (El Oh El) was such a roller coaster. I wouldn’t want to bore you with all the nitty gritty details as I’m sure you’ve had enough of that in so many Instagram and social media posts today but let’s just say 2017 wasn’t my finest year (I’ll dedicate a whole post to talking about that soon, when the time is right don’t worry) it was the year when I completely fell apart and came to the end of myself and yet Abba stayed all the way, patiently loving me to perfection (he’s still working on it) and held me in his arms. He completely scattered all my plans and I’m genuinely glad that he did. His was a whole lot better. Anyway, in the last few days of the year, he whispered some promises to my heart about the coming year which got me mad excited and crazy shook at the magnitude of the things he was saying but sitting there, as the clock turned 12 and the new year I had been anticipating all day came, my heart started to get scared. I had questions and doubts and my insecurities came alive, what if nothing changed? What if like the skies and the basic rhythms of life that accompanied any new day, nothing really changed?

But the truth is something had changed. Yes the temperature outside stayed the same and it felt like every normal day but our minds had the understanding that time had shifted and a new year had begun (didn’t matter that the sun wasn’t even up yet) and this understanding would lead to change in the dates we write in the days to come and increase in age and every other thing that the new year births.

Nothing changes until you change your mind

What am I trying to say? The difference was in our mindset, our believing that something had changed. (Like random thought, what if the people who did the time division and apportioned certain amount of days to a time frame and called it a year were wrong? Lol) What I’m saying is your “new beginning” starts when your mind believes it starts. (Doesn’t even have to be a new year for your new beginning to start) Where is your mind at? What truths are you choosing to believe?

2018 is going to be an amazing year in so many ways for so many people (never been so sure of anything in my entire life😂 as I am on this) but is your mind still in 2017? Don’t get so stuck on last year, that you fail to make the mental transition into this new year. Move on. Whatever change that is going to happen, starts in your mind – that’s where you know it after which it translates to your heart where you believe it❤️ I don’t have all the answers and I definitely don’t know what’s going to happen tomorrow, but I’m sure of one thing, and that is how insanely you are loved and how much transformation that love is capable of.

So did you have the best of 2017? Yeah that’s amazing but there’s better. Was your year not so great? Also beautiful, that was just the workout year and like all workout sessions, your sweat and pain was not in vain, this is the year all of that is going to make sense. Welcome to buffness😁 (just kidding but you get my point) I don’t know what your plans or dreams or hopes for the year are, I’m here to encourage you to trust! It won’t happen in an instant and there are times and periods where you’ll wonder if this is it but I want you to hang in there. Am I still afraid? Maybe. But it’s okay not to know what’s next, it’s okay to reach out and have him whisper you fears away. Let’s hold hands and take each day trusting, trusting that he’s here, loving us to perfection, leading us in righteousness, you are his dream come true. Let’s walk in that understanding.

Happy new year People! Love, love, love you to pieces and shreds. The sun has risen, let’s bask in its warmth!

“This new year, I promise to tell the truth, my truth just as it is. I don’t always have it all figured out, I don’t always make the best decisions but that is the beauty in the journey, a journey I promise to share with you, every step of the way”

3 thoughts on “Sunrise

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